I just wrote this to a dear "auntie" of mine and as I am very tired will copy it here and call it a day. :)
I thought Gavin did such a nice job on the blog! Aside from mixing up Marcie and Will, of course. ;) I admit I am very tired/weary and very grateful to have a husband who can manage so very well everything I am too busy and overwhelmed to tackle. Thank you for your prayers - they sustain us; or rather, the Lord sustains us through them!
I am sad tonight about Seth. We got to visit with him for a while today while the top of his incubator was off and the sides were down. He looked straight into my eyes as I sang songs to him, tears rolling down my face. He is so precious and vulnerable and "trapped," although he "should" be trapped in my body still, so I need to think of it that way. But the tube down his throat is such a sad, hard thing, especially the silent crying. All this to say, thanks for the prayers. I need them! Seth needs them; obviously we ALL need them! So thankful to KNOW God is loving and actively controlling everything that happens. He is good all the time. I have rarely wanted Jesus to return as much as I do now, watching my little baby boy struggle and hearing of all the suffering in the world around us and overseas. I am so glad there is a Redeemer who will make all things well and who cares more than we can imagine in the meantime, even turning evil into good.
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| The silent wail (but isn't he cute?!) |
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| Swaddled and sleeping peacefully after staring into my eyes for a while as I sang and talked to him. |
There are so many people who have blessed us so amazingly with cards and gifts and meals and service and handmade items for the babies! I am shockingly behind on thanking you individually, especially those who have sent gifts to our account. I think/hope you understand and would rather I spend the time/energy on the babies right now. (I am feeling stretched, to say the least.) We thank God for you, truly, and pray His richest blessings on you, too!
In His strong and loving grip,
Carrie
Prayed a lot for your sweet family today ...
ReplyDeleteThank you! We love and appreciate you guys; still praying for you, too. I know you can relate in ways no one else can, way above and beyond what we have experienced with our little guy.
DeleteI just lost everything that I had typed. Hopefully this time it will work.
ReplyDeleteOh Carrie, my heart goes out to you. I can sense your sadness from your post about Seth. I'm sending a hug your way. I can understand your feeling of being so stretched, as I also had three older children at home wanting my time and attention. There were some days that I had no idea how I was going to make it through the day. Jesus gave me enough strength to make it through each day, and trust me some days it was only enough for that day. Continue to lean and trust in Jesus. He will help you make it through each day as well. I'm going to attempt to attach a link to three songs. I don't know if it will let me on here. These three songs really helped me through. Maybe they will help you as well.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8JsRxVczmQ&feature=related Stong Enough by Matthew West
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrXmHaBP-A4 What it Means to be Loved by Mark Schulz
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOOFAaUGfRE Blessings by Laura Story
Gavin did a really good job on the post the other night. Let people help you as much as possible. I know that can be hard, as I hated to ask people for help. Don't worry about the thank you's. People will understand that you need to be with the babies, Isaac, and Gavin. Try to take care of yourself and get some sleep. It will help for when the babies start to come home. :) Isn't that exciting to think about. :)
You're doing a great job on keeping up with the pumping. It's helping all the babies so much. I know it's time consuming, but it will be worth it. I was so glad that I kept up with it. Once my little girl was home and she would have nothing to do with a bottle, it was all worth it. It is so neat that they already let you try to nurse David and Will. :)
Keep hanging in there. I was constantly reminded that it's a marathon not a sprint. You're in my thoughts and prayers
Sarah
I love that Blessings song! I heard it on the radio a couple of weeks ago for the second time, thinking of Seth and praying for him the whole song, of course. The first time I heard it was back in mid-February when I was convinced that I still wasn't pregnant despite a "great" cycle; powerfully reminded that my Father had His purposes in my infertility suffering, too. I cried and mopped the floor as I listened to the radio. :) Turned out I was pregnant with 5 blessings, including Seth! Found out 4 days later. I wouldn't trade his little life even thus far for anything. He is precious, precious, precious, and already a huge blessing to me! As are each of his siblings, of course. :)
DeleteThanks for all the other encouragements and reminders of this being a marathon. I was reminded by the nurses as well. It's better to pace myself and focus on one child at a time rather than frenetically trying to minister to each every time I at am the NICU, bouncing from bedside to bedside. I am so tired I can feel it in my head - I'm sure you know what that feels like?! Hard to sleep while pumping for multiple little babies!
Love and gratitude,
Carrie
sending special prayers to baby Seth
ReplyDeleteCarrie..what a lovely letter to your aunt. Praying, praying, praying for all of you and especially Seth today.
ReplyDeleteI echo everyone else. I know from past experience that I was so drained with someone in the hospital. So Just concentrate on the must and forget responses. Will continue to pray for all 5 and expecially little Seth. Judith
ReplyDeleteMy husband knew Gavin in college. I have been ready your posts since the quints were born and have been moved by your patience with the process. I had twins boys at 35 weeks and a third son at 32.5 weeks (after my water broke at 28.5 weeks). My third was in the NICU 6 very long weeks after I'd already been there for 4 before he was born (with twin 2 year olds at home). I'm praying for you to give yourself grace as you are stretched beyond your imagination with the ups and downs of the NICU, post-partum emotions, with pumping, visiting each baby, sleepless nights, calling the NICU for updates at all hours, the wisdom involved in knowing each child individually, and also keeping up with your older son. The verses that follow are the ones I clung to while I waited for my son to be born and for him to come home. God will provide for all of your needs as you wait for Him.
ReplyDeletePsalm 27:13-14 "I would have despaired unless I had believed I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the LORD."
I sat here reading this crying right along with you. My heart is just broken for you as a Mom to see your little precious baby struggling so and knowing there was nothing you could do. Although right now prayers, faith and belief is a lot to cling to. Prayers will certainly continue for Seth, all the babies, Issac and you both.
ReplyDeleteHave you heard the story behind the photo called "Rescuing hug"? It's about identical twins in Mass. that were in separate incubators. One was not expected to live. A nurse who had heard of a "double bedding multiple birth babies" procedure common in Europe but forbidden in this country for fear of passing infection, went against the rules and put the well baby in with the unwell one and immediately the sick baby's oxygen levels suddenly soared, her breathing became less labored, her crying stopped, and her normal pinkish complexion spread. The "Rescuing Hug" photo is of the twins lying on their tummies, side by side, sound asleep with the well baby's arm around the sick baby. Praying that your little Seth can become peaceful and healthy soon.
ReplyDeleteLord, You are the Creator of the universe, the Devine Healer who can heal Seth with just a whisper - please Lord, we pray that it be Your will to heal Seth's little lungs. Lord, we pray that it be soon, so that he can be cuddled by his mom and dad and feel their embrace. We thank you and praise you for the progress of the other babes. We lift up Carrie and Gavin, please continue to give them strength and peace. And, with no doubt or hesitation, we proclaim Your holiness and accept Your will. Amen. NKL
ReplyDeleteCarrie and Gavin, Praying, praying for sweet little Seth that God will put his healing hands on him praying for comfort and peace for you all also. What sweet blessings they all are. We pray every day and night for all of you especially that cutie Seth!!
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