But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him and his righteousness with their children's children . . . Psalm 103:17

Monday, September 23, 2013

When Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy

Hi all,

I'm writing this with some embarrassment, but since whenever I post prayer requests on here God REALLY answers, I'll go ahead and share: I had a complete crying meltdown today. I think it was a delayed stress reaction. Hopefully most of you know that feeling of one more thing going wrong or being difficult or sad, and you just slide over the edge. In my case, it was pretty much bedlam this morning (the morning I have the most help of the week - two wonderful people!), and I was exhausted. I find I need more like 9 hours of sleep than 7 on the spectrum of "the average person needs 7-9 hours of sleep per day," no doubt largely because of the stress and constant-ness of our situation. But it is HARD for me to go to bed at night because it's the only chance I have to get the house cleaned up, read a book, blog, etc.! It's the only time the house is quiet and "mine" to work in uninterrupted. And last night I got up with Seth at 4:30 to do inhalers, after having gotten up after midnight because I was too hungry to sleep. (Sometimes I don't eat enough during the day, or only eat junk. Working on rectifying that; eating as I type!)

Anyway, today I hit a wall. When I started trying to ask the speech therapist questions about feeding Seth, I fell apart. I just could not stop crying for the next hour or so. I think it had to do with the chaos around us, the strain of getting Isaac's homework done and getting him to school late (My first big mistake was not calling in Gavin to HELP! but he had a doctor's appointment anyway.), and then Will starting a runny nose. Remember those lurking fevers? Well, they lurk still, and we are still trying to keep Seth separate - another big stress. I don't want him back in the hospital.

Anyway, Gavin has been wonderful. He brought me flowers. He brain-stormed with me on how to help the situation(s) as a couple. He encouraged me to call him ASAP when something's brewing. I THANK GOD for a husband who is so supportive and loving!!

Thanks for your prayers. I really, really need them. These are the happiest days of my life, but also the most extendedly stressful. I feel so blessed that I feel guilty when it's actually hard sometimes. But I guess no matter how much help one receives, raising five exploring, growing babies and one very active school-aged child IS hard from time to time! :)

Love and gratitude,

Gavin, Carrie, Isaac, Will, David, Marcie, Seth, & Grace Jones

Gavin, Carrie, Isaac, Will, David, Marcie, Seth, & Grace Jones

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